Lately, I’ve noticed a growing trend in churches: labeling “young adult” groups as ages 18–36. And honestly… I disagree.

Yes, 18 is a young adult. But 36? That’s a completely different stage of life.

At 18, you’re either still in high school, just graduated, or just beginning to step into the real world. You’re figuring out who you are, what you believe, and what direction your life is going in. Most people at that age are still living at home or just starting to experience independence for the first time.

Now compare that to 36.

By 36, many people have been out of high school for nearly two decades. They’ve had years of life experience—careers, relationships, responsibilities, and in most cases, children or even grandchildren for some. That’s not “young adult” in the same way. That’s a fully established adult.

So when churches group 18-year-olds and 36-year-olds together, it creates a disconnect.

It’s not about disrespect—it’s about reality.

An 18-year-old and a 36-year-old are not on the same level in life. Their challenges, priorities, and perspectives are completely different. One is just starting out, while the other has already been through years of growth and life lessons.

Because of that, these groups can feel unbalanced. Younger people may feel out of place, unable to relate, or even intimidated. Instead of building connection, it can create distance.

In my opinion, a true “young adult” group should be more focused—something like ages 18–21.

That age range makes more sense because:

• Everyone is in a similar life stage
• Conversations are more relatable
• People are growing and learning at a similar pace
• There’s a stronger sense of community and understanding

At 18–21, most people are:

• Transitioning out of high school
• Exploring independence
• Still forming identity and beliefs
• Navigating early adulthood for the first time

That’s a unique phase of life that deserves its own space.

This isn’t about excluding older adults—it’s about being intentional. People in their late 20s and 30s also deserve spaces that reflect their stage of life.

Not everything needs to be grouped together.

Sometimes, smaller and more specific creates deeper connection.

And when people feel like they truly belong in a space—when they can relate, be understood, and grow alongside others in the same stage—that’s when real community happens.