I’ve been noticing a trend in church life that doesn’t sit right with me: so many conferences about love, forgiveness, and emotional healing seem to be aimed almost exclusively at women. Hmm 🤔 why is that?

It’s no secret that women often carry the brunt of emotional labor—whether in families, friendships, or even in church communities. This expectation spills over into spiritual spaces. Women are “expected” to nurture, to forgive, to heal relationships, and to pursue emotional growth. So naturally, church leadership often designs conferences and workshops that cater to that perceived need.

Men, on the other hand, are rarely the target of these programs. Traditional ideas about masculinity—don’t cry, be strong, handle your problems yourself—make it less likely that men will seek out spaces for emotional or spiritual growth. Churches may assume men “don’t need it” or won’t attend, and so the cycle continues.

The result? Women are encouraged and sometimes even pressured to learn about love, forgiveness, and relationships, while men are left out of these important conversations. And yet, these are universal teachings, meant for all of us.

It’s ironic and frustrating: the church preaches love and forgiveness as foundational values, but the platforms to explore and practice them are unevenly distributed. Men need these spaces too—but unless churches start creating them intentionally, the imbalance will persist.

If we truly want to live out love and forgiveness, we have to make room for everyone, not just the women who are willing to show up.